So FaceBook and Twitter is flooded with opinions lately on the recent death of Whitney Houston, a musical icon and legend. It seems you are either on the love her for her musical worthiness or hate her for her drug addiction camp. I personally fall into the first category, if I had to choose one or the other. The folks in the latter camp however, are bombarding us all on social media with their take on why the late Ms. Houston doesn’t deserve our grief and even worse, telling us that we are basically scum for grieving the loss of a celebrity but not grieving the loss of our soldiers or others in society who are not in the spotlight.

First of all, I disagree with the statements made that we do not care about those fighting overseas, or the multitudes of homeless, hungry, and deprived individuals around the world. One has nothing to do with the other. I personally, feel the pain and sadness when I imagine what life must be like, so many miles away from your loved ones, in hostile territories. Or what it must be like to wake hungry, the kind of hungry most of us here in the US have probably never even experienced, and to go to bed with the pain of not having eaten. It is actually extremely difficult for me to think about those things, because it makes me feel very helpless. As for those fighting overseas or those who have fought for our freedoms, I feel great respect for all they do and despair at the loss of our brave soldiers. Having family in a less developed country, I also feel sad over the lack of liberties in other countries. I have a family member who has been beaten, threatened, and nearly executed, all for simply trying to provide equal freedoms for others.

But, we as society do not take the time every day, to grieve the loss of every person, every day the way we do when a celebrity dies. For one, it just isn’t possible to have that sort of capacity for grief. Could you imagine if we felt the pain of EVERY single death? It isn’t possible. According to the US Census Bureau, there is 1 death every 12 seconds in the US, or 5 every minute, 300 every hour, for a total of about 7,200 deaths every single day.

So, I think it is unreasonable to expect us to pour out grief over the loss of every single individual we deem important. However, every once in a while a celebrity dies. We as people have a fascination with the media anyway, or else this wouldn’t even be a topic of discussion in either camp. Celebrities, and for me particularly, musicians, become part of our daily lives. We listen to their music. We hear who they are sleeping with, what they are wearing, what they are working on, what they are doing philanthropically and worst of all, all their vices and scandals. We somehow gain a connection to them.

For me, with Whitney Houston, I have briefly grieved her death and I do not feel bad or embarrassed to say that. When I heard she died, it was not a surprise, but no less, it was a shock. I grew up in the 80s. I loved Whitney. She had an amazing voice, and as a vocalist, despite her style of singing, you had to respect that voice. I have a now infamous recording amongst friends, of myself at the age of 7, on the phone with a my best friend. In the background, you can hear “I Wanna Dance With Somebody” by Whitney Houston. I am teasing my friend and claiming it is me singing. That phone recording, prompted my now husband, to buy me a Whitney Houston Greatest Hits CD for my birthday, when we were just starting to see each other. I have never even opened it, but I treasure it. It marked a moment in time for me. A time when I was developing strong feelings for someone who is now my partner in life. Music is such a big part of our lives. How often do we quote musicians or songs? We feel a connection to them. We hear a song and it reminds us of a moment in our lives. We feel we know them. I think it is reasonable that there is an outpouring from the public and that there is such media coverage of a celebrities death, because we demand it and we truly feel saddened by their deaths.

As for those who want to address her cause of death, I personally do not even feel that is worth going into in great detail. Death is sad. Period. Cause of death, can be controversial, but should not overshadow a person’s life. For those who say, what about the soldiers who die overseas? We know nothing about them, unless they are close friends and family members. Whose to say they are not battling their own addictions or have deep, dark, secrets that we just do not know? I think we should pay our respects to all we admire for their talents, for their sacrifices, for all the good that they bring to our world. As for their flaws and this goes for the famous and not famous, he who lives in a glass house, should not throw stones.